God is good... but I am exhausted. --- And so was he--exhausted. Exhausting his final breath in a forceful cry at the moment of unmerited abandonment by God himself restrained by his own mutilated hands and feet naked and humiliated violated by the very souls for whom he would secure salvation by the very souls... Continue Reading →
the ensemble (revised)
This is the significant revision of my piece that I originally published to lalouvealalune.blog on July 25, 2019. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0_OjixesdoA if you cannot follow my train of thought it does not mean that a train does not exist it does not mean my journey and my testimony of what I’ve seen and known and lived is... Continue Reading →
Adagio and the Late Bloomer
I'll remember your adagio kisses on my forehead. How for the first time in my life I actually wanted to give,how I wanted to give to you. O to apprehend this desire within myself--that it exists after all,all of my thirty-odd years.The desire to give of my body--without shame or anxiety, without fear or disgust,without... Continue Reading →
I was given a seed OR the difficult recipe for fruit
Revision, January 28, 2021 "Truly, truly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit." John 12:24 one seedone deatha prospect of new lifeof new mornings from fresh mourningif first, I make it through good-bye--through this night, throughthis winterpast... Continue Reading →
Jonah
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=geN2r_JRs7A Call me Jonah. O Lord, have mercy. may I be thrown into the sea. heck, I am already there. may I be swallowed and spit out by a whale. Yes. heart turned, but for me, also placed wherever the hell I am supposed to be? because honestly, God, I am kicking, and You know... Continue Reading →